Tag: Gospel

Strong, Weak, and the Call to Build One Another Up

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Church health, Romans

One of the most misunderstood sections of Romans is Paul’s discussion of “the strong” and “the weak.”

The issue appears simple—food laws, holy days, personal convictions—but Paul reveals something much deeper: the danger of confusing personal conviction with spiritual superiority.

The “strong” were likely mostly Gentiles, confident in their freedom.

They felt they were superior knowing food sacrificed to idols was a farce, and they had no qualms eating it and praising the Lord for it.

The “weak” were likely mostly Jewish believers, shaped by Torah and conscience.

For them, such actions offended their sensibilities, and they felt victimized that others in the church wouldn’t adopt their practices on such issues.

The two groups hold polar opposite views.

And Paul does something surprising.

He refuses to tell us who is right.

Instead, he tells us who is responsible.

Acceptance Without Agreement

Paul opens Romans 14 with a radical command:

“Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters.”

Acceptance is not based on agreement with each other—it is based on our mutual standing before God.

The strong must not despise.
The weak must not judge.

Why?

Because God has accepted both.

Paul reinforces this by introducing a parallel issue—holy days.

Some observe them. Some ignore them.

Again, Paul refuses to pick sides.

Each must be fully convinced in their own mind. Each one’s beliefs and actions on these matters are done “to the Lord.”

Uniformity is not Paul’s goal. Unity is.

Living Before God, Not Each Other

Paul reminds the church that none of us live—or die—for ourselves.

Every decision we make is lived before God.

When we judge motives, we place ourselves in God’s seat. When we prioritize our rights and our desires over love, we forget who the church belongs to.

Paul’s warning is sobering:

“Why do you judge your brother or sister? … We will all stand before God’s judgment seat.”

Unity breaks down when we stop asking, “Does this honor God?” and start asking, “Do I like this?”

Rights, Love, and the Kingdom of God

Paul acknowledges freedom—but he reframes it.

The kingdom of God is not about eating and drinking.
It is about righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit.

The question is not, “Am I allowed?”
The question is, “Am I building up my brothers and sisters in Christ, or am I tearing down members of Christ’s body?”

True gospel freedom expresses itself through self-limiting love.

Paul’s call is not to abandon conviction—but to consider it less important than loving one another.

Christ, the Ultimate Example

Paul closes this section by pointing us to Jesus.

Christ did not please himself.
Christ bore insults.
Christ became a servant for Jews and Gentiles alike so that with one voice, God might be glorified.

This is what righteousness looks like in community.

Not power.
Not privilege.
Not control.

But peace.

And when the church lives this way, the gospel is no longer just proclaimed—it is visible.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him.”

That is Paul’s prayer.
And it remains God’s invitation to the church today.

Unity in Diversity in Romans

When the Gospel Replaces Power with Peace

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Church health, Romans

Romans can be a complicated read.

It’s is not a letter you rush through. It is dense, pastoral, theological, and deeply practical. Trying to distill its message into a handful of lessons (in the way Romans is often taught) is a tall order…one I had to accomplish recently at an adult retreat for another church in our area.

In my experience, Romans is usually referenced, but not studied. It’s venerated for being “theological,” but never really wrestled with by church Bible studies.

But Romans was never written to be admired from a distance. It’s not supposed to be a theology textbook. It was written to shape a community.

And the struggle the Roman church faced is not all that different from the struggles our churches in the United States face today.

Before Paul ever gets into the weeds of doctrine, justification, or the Spirit, he is addressing a church fractured by power, privilege, and competing visions of righteousness. His aim is nothing less than replacing those things with the peace that comes from the gospel of Jesus Christ.

That purpose is captured succinctly in Romans 1:17:

“For in the gospel the righteousness of God is revealed—a righteousness that is by faith from first to last.”

If the righteousness of God is revealed in the gospel, then the gospel must transform us. God’s righteousness is not meant to be added onto our existing assumptions—it is meant to replace them.

Put simply:
If I want to be among “the righteous who live by faith,” I must adopt God’s definition of righteousness, not my own. And that only happens through faith in Jesus Christ, revealed through the gospel.

When “Righteous Community” Gets Complicated

Early in my ministry, I experienced firsthand what happens when a church says it wants to be righteous—but hasn’t fully allowed the gospel to redefine what righteousness looks like.

A church I was working for had been stagnant for a while. Leadership was dwindling. The preacher was nearing retirement. Elders were ill or passing away. Deacon was largely a title, not the description of “service” one would expect. Growth had long since plateaued.

A few months after being hired as a youth minister fresh out of college, I unexpectedly became the preaching minister.

We wanted to be a righteous community—followers of Jesus committed to growing the kingdom and reaching the lost. And once we started doing that, people showed up.

New residents. Longtime locals turning their lives around. Newlyweds. Newly remarried. Newly re-remarried.

People were being baptized, and attendance grew.

Then one Sunday afternoon, the phone started ringing.

One tearful call after another. People telling me they would never step foot in our church again—maybe any church ever again.

A longtime member had taken it upon herself to call these new people and tell them they were not welcome at “her church.”

That same day, an elder resigned after receiving threats from the same person—because, in her mind, leadership was letting “ruining” her church.

That story still haunts me. Not because it’s unique—but because it’s far too familiar.

When the church we know starts to look different, we can begin acting in profoundly un-Christlike ways. If we are not intentionally shaped by the gospel, we will default to protecting our preferences, our comfort, and our sense of control—and we will destroy our witness about Christ in the process.

The Problem in Rome

The Roman church faced its own version of this crisis.

The gospel had taken root in Rome, but history complicated everything. Emperor Claudius expelled Jews from the city, forcing Jewish Christians to leave (see Acts 18:2). Gentile believers became the majority. Leadership shifted. Customs changed.

Eventually, Jewish believers returned.

And when they did, the church looked different. Bacon was being served at the potluck, so to speak.

What they experienced felt like a loss of power, influence, and identity. And that perceived loss produced division.

Rome itself reinforced hierarchy:
– Citizens over non-citizens.
– Men over women.
– Free people over slaves.

And yet, when Paul lists the members of the Roman churches in Romans 16, the picture is stunning.

Women in leadership. Gentiles entrusted with Scripture. Slaves named alongside free people. House churches filled with diversity.

Phoebe—a Gentile woman—is the deacon letter carrier, interpreter, and likely the one who performed Romans before the congregations.

Paul could have solved the tension by sorting people into separate churches. Jews meet with Jews, and Gentiles meet with Gentiles. That’s the easy solution.

But Paul didn’t do that.

Instead, he wrote Romans pleading with both groups to be unified.

Because unity in diversity is not a problem to fix—it is the gospel on display.

The righteousness of God is revealed not just in what the church believes, but in how it lives together.

And therein lies the lesson for American churches. Instead of constantly attacking each other over minor differences in understanding, instead of separating along racial lines, instead of maintaining the “us versus them” identity wars in the pulpits, we should be united.

We serve one Lord.

We share one baptism.

The same Spirit points us to the same Savior.

Our likeness far outweighs our differences. And that’s what Paul emphasizes to the Roman church.

“There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”

Maybe if we will focus on Paul’s message in Romans, then our churches can begin to embrace the unity in diversity that proclaims the Gospel rather than our divided communities that preach against it.

Divorce and Remarriage in the Church

Biblical Divorce and Jesus – Part 2

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Christianity, Marriage and Divorce, Scripture

In my previous article we began to explore what Jesus has to say about divorce in Matthew 19. We concluded that just because God, Moses, and Jesus all realize that broken marriages exist and may need to end via divorce, we shouldn’t set broken marriages as the ideal outcome for all marriages.

The Pharisees see divorce as the standard, but Jesus sets pure hearts and loving, committed marriages as the ideal, just as it was in the beginning before sin ever entered the picture. Sin is a universal problem. Divorce is painful. Jesus calls us to God’s ideal, rather than accepting brokenness as a way of life. Blessed are those who mourn. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness. Blessed are the merciful. Blessed are the peacemakers. This is the way of Jesus. And the way of Jesus doesn’t view marriage as just another relationship bound for the trash heap.
The Pharisees see divorce as the standard, but Jesus sets pure hearts and loving, committed marriages as the ideal, just as it was in the beginning before sin ever entered the picture. Sin is a universal problem. Divorce is painful. Jesus calls us to God’s ideal, rather than accepting brokenness as a way of life. Blessed are those who mourn. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness. Blessed are the merciful. Blessed are the peacemakers. This is the way of Jesus. And the way of Jesus doesn’t view marriage as just another relationship bound for the trash heap.

Now, let’s consider some of the consequences that arise from not approaching marriage and divorce biblically.

Consequences of Illegitimate Divorce

Jesus clarifies for the Pharisees the consequence of “any matter” divorces to marry another as causing adultery. When someone misuses the Scriptures about divorce to ordain “any matter” divorces, they have not legitimately divorced their spouse. Again, please note that Jesus is dealing squarely with the Pharisees’ question about Deuteronomy 24. Jesus is not here to abolish the Torah (law), to set aside God’s Word, or to do something different from what the Lord ever intended. What Jesus is doing is strengthening the sanctity of marriage, while rightly interpreting Deuteronomy 24. And Jesus rightly tells us that Deuteronomy 24 only deals with the “nakedness of a matter”, and that matter is sexual indecency, not “any matter.” And when someone divorces someone else for “any matter,” they have not legitimately divorced their spouse. In the eyes of Jesus, the man of Matthew 19 commits adultery when he remarries, because he is still married to his original spouse in the eyes of God.

This statement by Jesus is a protection of the married woman. In that world (though not in God’s intent), women did not have as many freedoms as men. In Jesus’ world, man could unilaterally divorce a woman for “any and every reason”, leaving the woman with very little support. This teaching of Jesus intends to stop these men from using and abusing women in this way under the guise of Scriptural divorce. According to Jesus, when men or women (see the parallel passage in Mark 10:10-12) seek to use the “any matter” exit out of a marriage to chase after another, they are not acting righteously. If they marry another after this, they have committed adultery against their original spouse. Jesus and Aquiba certainly wouldn’t have agreed on legitimate grounds for divorce.

The Disciples are Shocked

10 The disciples said to him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”
11 Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12 For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.”

Mt 19:10–12, The New International Version (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2011).

It seems the disciples had accepted Hillel’s teaching, which was the predominate divorce teaching of the day. Now hearing Jesus state that marriage was intended to last—that ending a marriage just because you feel like it was unacceptable—the disciples believe marriage may not be a good option!

And Jesus agrees! Well, sort of agrees. The standard of marriage has been set, and Jesus points out that some choose to be celibate “for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.” Jesus goes further to state that those “who can accept this should accept it.” In other words, if one can live a single, celibate life that honors God, they should. And I bet you haven’t heard many sermons about these words of Jesus, or the words of Paul in agreement (see my next post on this).

Many churches have taught that good Christians need to grow up and get married. Both Jesus and Paul would argue that getting married isn’t a sin, but you might live a more faithful, God honoring life by being single. Churches shouldn’t single shame people! Both Jesus and Paul viewed single celibacy as a high calling that should be accepted if possible.

But notice Jesus doesn’t budge on his ideal of marriage. Marriage isn’t to be entered into lightly, and isn’t to be ended lightly either. Any divorce is painful, and divorcing for “any matter” is just plain sinful.

What about the other Jesus on Divorce passages?

Scholars have generally approached the shorter divorce statements of Jesus as abbreviated versions of Matthew 19/Mark 10. These abbreviated accounts appear in Matthew 5:31-32, as well as Luke 16:18, and should not be viewed as in conflict with Matthew 19. As is the case with many themes in the Sermon on the Mount, the quotable moments from the sermon are later elaborated upon by Matthew’s stories of Jesus. The purpose of abbreviation was to produce a short statement that could be easily remembered, and jogged the memory to recall the fuller statement later. Therefore, 5:31-32 is the shocking attention getting statement, and is fleshed out more fully by the Pharisee’s testing in Matthew 19.

Let’s take Matthew 5:31-32 on its face value. If this was the only statement from Jesus that we had on divorce, then Jesus would clearly not agree with Scripture since the whole point of the certificate of divorce was to allow the newly divorced woman to marry again. The only remarriage of that woman that was forbidden was back to her original spouse. To say this is the final statement of Jesus, and everything must be filtered through this abbreviated statement puts the words of Jesus in conflict with Deuteronomy, God’s own divorce and reasoning in Jeremiah 3, and with his apostle Paul (we’ll deal with this passage next). One needs to understand the fuller context of Jesus’ teachings here in order to discern a Biblical theology of divorce that tracks with all Scripture has to say about divorce, and allowing Jesus to be our guide through those texts. Reducing Matthew 5 to a standalone verdict on divorce creates textual disharmony, and puts the Holy Spirit at odds with Himself. Let’s avoid oversimplifying complex Biblical teachings, and instead adopt a more nuanced understanding. Doing good Biblical theology matters.

Historical context also matters when we consider the larger contextual flow of this portion of the Sermon on the Mount, namely the leadership of the Jewish people in that time. Herod Antipas had a public divorce from his wife in order to marry the wife of his brother, Herodias. This is the illegitimate marriage John the Baptist criticized, was arrested for, and ultimately put to death over (see Matthew 14 for more on this). In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus in rapid succession speaks of murder (5:21-26), adultery (5:27-30), and illegitimate divorce (5:31-32), all of which Herod Antipas was guilty of, and publicly known for. Jesus certainly wasn’t one to pull punches when dealing with the religious elite. Instone-Brewer provides a good summary of Luke 16.

The precise wording of the Lukan version fits the actions of Herod Antipas particularly well. It describes the actions of Herod, who divorced his wife in order to marry Herodias, and Herodias, who divorced her husband Philip in order to marry Herod (Josephus, Ant. 18.110–12). The verb describing the woman as ἀπολελυμένην, “divorced,” is usually translated as a passive, but it could also be a reflexive middle, which would fit Herodias better because she initiated the divorce herself. This makes sense in the context of Luke where the Gospel speaks about the ministry of John the Baptist (in v. 16). John was the only person who stood up against Herod and told him that he was acting sinfully.
The more serious problem with these shorter versions is the misunderstanding that they can produce in a reader. When Jesus’ conclusion is removed from the context of the debate, it is impossible for a reader to understand the meaning.

David Instone-Brewer, Divorce and Remarriage in the Bible: The Social and Literary Context (Grand Rapids, MI; Cambridge, U.K.: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 2002), 160–161.

I appreciate Instone-Brewer’s summation of Luke 16:18 being about John the Baptist (16:16) and his criticism of Herod Antipas, to which I believe Jesus issues his own criticism in the parable of the Rich Man and Lazarus in the immediately following verses (16:19-31).

What Jesus never said, and how churches have misapplied it

I have heard many sermons and classes that seem to take Jesus’ words in Matthew 19 as the trump card for any and every divorce on the planet. According to these teachers, if someone divorces for any reason other than sexual infidelity, the divorce is invalid (which ignores whole passages of the Bible). These are not small, misguided churches with uneducated folks doing the best they know how. Some well known megachurches with well educated staff members have also misapplied Jesus’ words.

Well known pastor John MacArthur’s church disfellowshipped Eileen Gray and her children for leaving David Gray, Eileen’s husband, because he had been physically abusing her and their children. Eileen went to her church elders and disclosed the child abuse her husband David had committed. Rather than report the matter to police as required by law, the church instructed Eileen that she and her children must stay with her husband David, stating Eileen needed to “suffer for Jesus” by enduring David’s abuse of her and her children. Eileen Gray was kicked out of the church, and John MacArthur asked everyone to pray for David Gray because he was the victim. David Gray is now serving 21 years to life in a California prison for his 2005 convictions for aggravated child molestation, corporal injury to a child, and child abuse.

If you truly believe Jesus wants the victims of abuse to stay with their abuser, you truly don’t know Jesus and his teachings. If you believe that a violent, abusive marriage is God honoring simply because sexual immorality hasn’t occurred (turns out it actually did happen in this case), you don’t know the Word of God. Exodus 21 sets the bare standards of a God-honoring marriage, and Eileen Gray’s divorce was absolutely valid. Jesus never came to delete Exodus 21 from our Bibles. Jesus corrected the Pharisee’s distorted understanding of Deuteronomy 24 and the ways they used it to abuse women. And sadly, people have taken these same words of Jesus and also abused women with them. May God forgive our wicked ways.

As of the time of this writing, Grace Community Church has not retracted their statements, acknowledged any wrong doing, or apologized for their role in perpetuating Eileen’s abuse by ignoring her cries for help. They stand by their statements and inaction.

There is so much more that could be written about Jesus and Matthew 19, and perhaps I’ll return to this passage in future posts to address any questions you may have on this passage. Next week we will turn our attention to Paul and 1 Corinthians 7. But for now, let’s consider what Jesus did and didn’t say.

  • Jesus responds to a question from the Pharisees, which directly quotes the common interpretation of Deuteronomy 24. Jesus’ response is then an interpretation of Deuteronomy 24.
  • By responding to one text of the Bible, Jesus did not abolish other texts of the Bible on the same subject. Therefore, Exodus 21 is still a valid teaching about divorce for today (as we’ll see when Paul deals with divorce in 1 Corinthians 7).
  • Jesus taught that the one who ends a marriage without valid grounds (the man in the case of Matthew 19, and either party in the case of Mark 10) to marry another is guilty of adultery.
  • Notice that Jesus never condemns the victim in these divorces. If one party wrongly divorces the victim, the victim has done no wrong. In this case, one party has sinned and one party is innocent. It is the one who abuses their spouse through an illegitimate ending of the marriage that is guilty.
  • I reiterate my original point in this series of posts that being divorced does not make one guilty of sin. Divorce is often caused by sin, but divorce itself is not a sin. In the examples Jesus gives, the wronged party has done no wrong, and should feel no shame for their divorced status. The hard heart of the former spouse is the reason God gave a certificate of divorce, which frees them to marry again.
  • Paul’s teachings on divorce draw upon Deuteronomy 24 and Exodus 21, and will further enlighten how to interpret Jesus’ words here.

Biblical Divorce Series

  1. God’s Divorce
  2. Biblical Divorce: Divorce in Israel – Part 1
  3. Biblical Divorce: Divorce in Israel – Part 2
  4. Biblical Divorce: Divorce in Israel – Part 3
  5. Biblical Divorce and Jesus – Part 1
  6. Biblical Divorce and Jesus – Part 2
  7. The Apostle Paul and Divorce
Divorce and Remarriage in the Church

Biblical Divorce and Jesus – Part 1

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Christianity, Marriage and Divorce, Scripture

In my previous article, I concluded our look at the substantive Old Testament texts dealing with divorce. We have previously discussed Deuteronomy 24, and understanding that text is important for interpreting Jesus’ words on divorce, especially when it comes to Matthew 19. If you have not read the article on Deuteronomy 24, please do so before continuing with this post.

When we read the words of Jesus concerning divorce in Matthew 19 with an Old Testament eye, we find Jesus is not laying down new rules for marriage and divorce. Instead, he is settling the age-old argument of “any matter” and “indecency” (seriously, go read about Deuteronomy 24). Let’s begin by reading Matthew’s retelling of the story.

Matthew 19

3 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”
4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ v 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Mt 19:3–6, The New International Version (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2011).

They Asked Jesus The Wrong Question

When Jesus responds to these Pharisees, he completely sidesteps their question, and instead shows them the problem behind their desire to ask these questions. You see, the Pharisees want to know what God views as acceptable divorce, to determine when they were allowed to divorce. Instead, Jesus wants them to recognize that God’s ideal is not divorce (even though God himself experienced divorce). Instead, God calls all people to honor all their covenants (Mal 2:10, 16). Jesus wants these Pharisees to realize that marriage should never be entered into lightly, as we are making a commitment to another person for better or worse. Mining the Scriptures looking for loopholes to end a marriage because a woman burned your toast, or because you found someone more attractive, is never what God intended. And yes, Jewish rabbis of the day actually made these theological arguments from Deuteronomy 24. Just consider this quote as recorded in the Mishna, Gittin 9:10.

9:10 A The House of Shammai say, “A man should divorce his wife only because he has found grounds for it in unchastity,
B “since it is said, Because he has found in her indecency in anything (Dt. 24:).”
C And the House of Hillel say, “Even if she spoiled his dish,
D “since it is said, Because he has found in her indecency in anything.
E R. Aqiba says, “Even if he found someone else prettier than she,
F “since it is said, And it shall be if she find no favor in his eyes (Dt. 24:1).”

Jacob Neusner, The Mishnah : A New Translation (New Haven, CT: Yale University Press, 1988), 487.

To Jesus, the intent of man and woman being made for one another, designed by God to overcome the shortcomings of the other, working together to fulfill God’s design for humanity…that’s what marriage should be. Hillel, Aqiba, and the Pharisees show they have forgotten why marriage even exists, and spend their time looking for the first instance when a marriage can be ended to pursue others.

Is Jesus Ignoring Scripture?

After realizing that Jesus has destroyed their motivation for asking about divorce, the Pharisees are clearly confused. Is Jesus setting aside the Scriptures? The very word of God came through Moses after all (Exod 7:1-7), and Moses clearly indicated that divorce was legal, even requiring a certificate of divorce. So, they question Jesus again.

7 “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”
8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

Mt 19:7–9, The New International Version (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2011).

Jesus once again points out that God’s original intent was not for humans to divorce. They were to be together forever in unity with each other and with him. But that’s not what happened. Sin entered the garden, and damaged the relationship between husband and wife, breaking down every human relationship from what God intended. As Derek Kidner so aptly summed it up in his commentary on Genesis, “‘To love and to cherish’ becomes ‘to desire and to dominate.'”

One of the effects of sin was the hardening of our hearts toward one another. This is the root cause of all our struggles in this world. And when our hearts are hard, we act in unkind and unloving ways toward one another. And sadly, this sometimes damages marriages beyond repair. This is why Moses gave the certificate of divorce. Moses was not operating outside the will of God by doing this, but rather God led Moses to navigate the best of a bad situation. But just because God, Moses, and Jesus all realize that bad situations exist, we shouldn’t set bad situations as the bar. We shouldn’t set broken marriages as the ideal.

The Pharisees see the divorce as the standard, and Jesus sets pure hearts and loving, committed marriages as the ideal, just as it was in the beginning before sin ever entered the picture. Sin is a universal problem. Divorce is painful. Jesus calls us to God’s ideal, rather than accepting brokenness as a way of life. Blessed are those who mourn. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness. Blessed are the merciful. Blessed are the peacemakers. This is the way of Jesus. And the way of Jesus doesn’t view marriage as just another relationship bound for the trash heap.

Coming Next in Part 2

When I finished writing about Jesus and divorce earlier today, I was sitting at over 3,000 words and wondering if I needed to add more (indeed I do). I know that stopping at this point in Matthew 19 causes many to suggest I’m sidestepping what Jesus says next, or I’m diluting his message. I want to reassure you that I am not stopping here. Jesus, the Pharisees, and the disciples tell us much more in Matthew 19.

We will look at what Jesus has to say about the consequences of an illegitimate divorce, what the shocked reactions of the disciples tell us about their understanding of marriage, and what Jesus has to say about living a single and celibate life.

Additionally we’ll dig into Mark 10, Luke 16, and a real life example of how the misapplication of Jesus’ words caused a well known pastor and his megachurch in the United States to disfellowship a physically and sexually abused woman and children for leaving her husband’s/father’s abuse. They did this because, in their understanding, Jesus would only allow someone to leave this situation if the family had proof this man had committed sexual immorality outside their marriage. The man is now in prison for his crimes against them.

For now, let’s take a break and look at what we have learned so far.

Summary of Biblical Divorce thus far in Matthew 19

  • Jesus responds to a question from the Pharisees, which directly quotes the common interpretation of Deuteronomy 24. Jesus’ response is then an interpretation of Deuteronomy 24.
  • By responding to one text of the Bible, Jesus did not abolish other texts of the Bible on the same subject. Therefore, Exodus 21 is still a valid teaching about divorce for today (as we’ll see when Paul deals with divorce in 1 Corinthians 7).
  • Jesus taught that the one who ends a marriage without valid grounds (the man in the case of Matthew 19, and either party in the case of Mark 10) to marry another is guilty of adultery.
  • Notice that Jesus never condemns the victim in these divorces. If one party wrongly divorces the victim, the victim has done no wrong. In this case, one party has sinned and one party is innocent. It is the one who abuses their spouse through an illegitimate ending of the marriage that is guilty.
  • I reiterate my original point in this series of posts that being divorced does not make one guilty of sin. Divorce is often caused by sin, but divorce itself is not a sin. In the examples Jesus gives, the wronged party has done no wrong, and should feel no shame for their divorced status. The hard heart of the former spouse is the reason God gave a certificate of divorce, which frees them to marry again.
  • Paul’s teachings on divorce draw upon Deuteronomy 24 and Exodus 21, and will further enlighten how to interpret Jesus’ words here.

Biblical Divorce Series

  1. God’s Divorce
  2. Biblical Divorce: Divorce in Israel – Part 1
  3. Biblical Divorce: Divorce in Israel – Part 2
  4. Biblical Divorce: Divorce in Israel – Part 3
  5. Biblical Divorce and Jesus – Part 1
  6. Biblical Divorce and Jesus – Part 2
  7. The Apostle Paul and Divorce

Paul: The Offensive Apostle?

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Uncategorized

Paul was offensive. But probably not in the way you think.

We’re looking at the Ephesian letter each Sunday morning during our sermon time, and Wednesday nights we’re diving a little deeper into questions from those sermons, as well as trying to get our minds wrapped around Paul’s way of thinking. We spent our last two class sessions talking about “the powers” that Paul writes about in this letter (Eph. 1:19-21, 2:1-2, 3:10-11, 6:12, etc.)

Without reteaching those classes here, let me summarize by saying that Paul, his audience, and those who wrote the Bible as a whole recognized that there are many powers at play in this world that are either good, or evil. And when we get tangled up in serving those powers rather than serving Christ, it’s a huge problem. Though you and I probably aren’t tempted to wander into a pagan temple, we do dedicate a lot of time and resources to serving our own comfort, entertainment, hobbies, etc. Paul would refer to these things, as well as other spiritual and cosmic forces, as “the powers.” And sadly, sometimes we do serve the powers over and above serving Christ.

One of those powers is culture. For Paul’s original audience, your home would be structured in a certain way because the powers that be have mandated it. Let’s look at a couple of examples from names you will recognize that will teach us how a household should be structured in Paul’s time.

“Seeing then that the state is made up of households, before speaking of the state we must speak of the management of the household. The parts of household management correspond tot he persons who compose the household, and a complete household consists of slaves and freemen. Now we should begin by examining everything in its fewest possible elements; and teh first and fewest possible parts of a family are master and slave, husband and wife, father and children.”

Aristotle, Politics, 1:3

Aristotle makes it clear that the “state” must be run a certain way to survive and function properly, and the key relationships within the home are “master and slave, husband and wife, father and children.” Paul addresses these exact relationships in Ephesians 6, but I want us to understand what “the powers” of the day believe concerning the household. Let’s turn once again to Aristotle for clarity.

“Of houshold management we have seen that there are three parts: one is the rule of a master over slaves, which has been discussed already, another of a father, and the third of a husband. A husband and father, we saw, rules over wife and children, both free, but the rule differs; the rule over his children being royal, and the ruler over his wife is based on natural constitution. For although there may be exceptions to the order of nature, the male is by nature fitter for command than the female, just as the elder and full-grown is superior to the younger and more immature.”

Aristotle, Politics, 1:12

The Jewish historian Josephus takes a slightly different view than Aristotle.

“The woman…is in all things inferior to the man. Let her accordingly be obedient, not for her humiliation, but that she may be directed; for God has given authority to the man.”

Josephus, Against Apion, 2:24

Now that we know the views held by “the powers” of Paul’s day, let’s hear the Holy Spirit’s wisdom on how a household should be viewed, as relayed to us by the Apostle.

“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

Paul, Ephesians 5:21 NIV

As I said before, Paul was offensive, but not in the way you think. The idea that everyone in the household would submit to the other because of Christ is scandalous! This flies in the face of the structure of the Empire. According to “the powers” of the day, everything is for the man’s benefit. Wives, children, and slaves all serve at the pleasure of the man of the house and only exist to bring him comfort. Nobody structures their relationships this way! But for Paul, it’s crucial to understanding and living out the Gospel in our lives.

Authoritarian hierarchy is the way of the powers. But that’s not God’s way. That’s not Paul’s understanding of the world. All household codes were written to the male explaining how they should rule/control those in their household. But Paul takes a different approach. Paul will speak directly to women, children, and slaves, instantly elevating their status! And notice how Paul speaks: first to the wife, then to the husband. First to the children, then to the father. First to the slave, and then to the master.

Do you see how upside down Paul’s approach to the household is when compared to the household dictated by “the powers?” Paul’s words are shocking and scandalous in an empire that is sustained by keeping power through the structure of the home. When the house operates like the Empire, you support and perpetuate the Empire.

But that’s not the way of Christ. That’s not the way of God’s Kingdom. That’s not the leading of the Holy Spirit. Paul tells his readers that every relationship with every man, woman, and child, regardless of class, or status, is filtered through the understanding that we all submit to one another because of Christ. This is the Christian household. This is life in the Spirit.

Join us Sunday at 8:30am or 10:00am at Countryside Christian Church as we worship together, eat the Lord’s Supper together, and unpack these relationships further. You can also join our 10:00 service online.

In the meantime, consider what it means to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”

Unity in Diversity in Romans

Christ Includes Everyone

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Acts, Scripture

The Spirit leads where He wants, and it doesn’t always match our plans.

In Acts 6 we read about the Hellenistic Jewish widows being slighted in the distribution of food. The suggestion agreed upon by all was to appoint 7 Hellenists to carry out that ministry, men who were full of the Spirit and wisdom. Within the list of 7 we encounter Stephen and Philip in other portions of Luke’s story. Today we look at Philip’s missionary career, likely something he had never planned to do.

After the first century “meals on wheels” problem became known, the Twelve continued with their ministry of preaching and prayer. This was their calling. The Seven were called to distribute food. And yet, it’s only a few verses later that Stephen, full of the Holy Spirit, is moved to preach about Jesus. The Spirit leads where He wants, and it doesn’t always match our plans. Stephen’s willingness to follow the Spirit leads to his death, and great persecution against the Church. But God used that persecution in order to spread the Gospel to other areas!

We next encounter Philip not distributing food, but preaching! The Spirit leads where He wants, and it doesn’t always match our plans. The persecution drove him into Samaria, and there, like Stephen and Jesus before him, began to perform signs such as casting out demons and healing the paralyzed and lame. Many men and women were baptized because Philip followed the leading of the Spirit to go wherever he was called. And wherever he went, he preached the Gospel of Jesus.

Next, we find the Spirit leading Philip to a road headed southwest out of Jerusalem. There Philip is told to talk to a man riding in a chariot. All we really know about this man is that he was an Ethiopian (likely a black-skinned man from what the Old Testament refers to as the region of Cush), he was the treasurer for the queen, and he was a eunuch.

There’s a lot to unpack here as we consider the theme of the disciples being “witnesses…to the ends of the earth.” This treasurer was likely a “God fearer,” similar to Cornelius. He had been to Jerusalem, but as a eunuch he would not have been allowed to enter the Temple. We could chase this rabbit a long way down the rabbit hole, but suffice it to say this was God’s way of telling Israel not to adopt the practice of castration in their communities. More on this in a moment.

For the treasurer to travel all the way to Jerusalem shows just how deep his faith is. I wonder how he felt being prohibited from entering the Temple upon arrival? Did he know he would be kept from joining the assembly before his journey, and traveled anyway? Or was this a surprise to him? For Luke, these details were not needed, and we are left to wonder.

What we do know is the treasurer had a copy (or partial copy) of the Isaiah scroll. Specifically, he was reading from the Greek translation of Isaiah 53:7-8.

This is the passage of Scripture the eunuch was reading:
“He was led like a sheep to the slaughter,
and as a lamb before its shearer is silent,
so he did not open his mouth.
In his humiliation he was deprived of justice.
Who can speak of his descendants?
For his life was taken from the earth.”

Acts 8:32-33 NIV

Now we don’t know every detail about what Philip told this Ethiopian treasurer. We know that he started with Isaiah 53 and began to preach the Gospel of Jesus, and his message must have included baptism. But I would guess that Philip also had this Ethiopian foreigner, this eunuch, read Isaiah 56.

Let no foreigner who is bound to the Lord say,
“The Lord will surely exclude me from his people.”
And let no eunuch complain,
“I am only a dry tree.”
For this is what the Lord says:
“To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths,
who choose what pleases me and hold fast to my covenant—
to them I will give within my temple and its walls a memorial and a name
better than sons and daughters;
I will give them an everlasting name
that will endure forever.
And foreigners who bind themselves to the Lord
to minister to him,
to love the name of the Lord,
and to be his servants,
all who keep the Sabbath without desecrating it
and who hold fast to my covenant—
these I will bring to my holy mountain
and give them joy in my house of prayer.
Their burnt offerings and sacrifices will be accepted on my altar;
for my house will be called
a house of prayer for all nations.” The Sovereign Lord declares—
he who gathers the exiles of Israel:
“I will gather still others to them
besides those already gathered.”

Isaiah 56:3-8 NIV

This is the same passage Jesus referenced when he overturned the tables in the Temple. This very practice of excluding “differents” is what so offended Jesus that he pronounced condemnation and destruction upon the Temple. The words of God recorded in Isaiah 56 remind us of God’s plan all along. It was never about God blessing one people group, but rather bringing blessing and salvation to all nations by working through one nation. God is not in the exclusion business. He wants everyone to be saved! The Spirit leads where He wants, and it doesn’t always match our plans.

Whereas the Temple authorities would have prohibited the Ethiopian eunuch from joining their assembly, Philip lays no such barrier.

As they traveled along the road, they came to some water and the eunuch said, “Look, here is water. What can stand in the way of my being baptized?”

Acts 8:36 NIV

What can stand in the way of my being baptized? Absolutely nothing! All are welcome in Christ’s Kingdom! He died for all people! And his table is open for all!

So what are you waiting for? What’s keeping you on the outside? Most people I’ve met think that they will be excluded, or not welcomed because of their past. They believe that even though they want to follow Christ and join his family, they won’t be accepted. But that’s not how our God operates! Our Savior doesn’t just save good people (and none of us are good), he saves messed up people like you and me!

Jesus died to save those who struggle with sexual sins, idolatry, homosexuality, theft, greed, drunkenness, foul language, and every other imaginable sin. As a matter of fact, that list describes the makeup of the early church! The difference is they were washed and made clean through Christ. They didn’t stay in their sins because someone welcomed them and taught them about Christ. You’ll never look into the eyes of someone Christ didn’t die for. You’ll never find someone God doesn’t want to save. So why would we ever turn someone away?

If you haven’t joined a church family, why not? Become a member of a community of Christ today! Get plugged in and get about the business of welcoming others into the family!

And if you haven’t accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, and you haven’t committed your life to him, then the words of this Ethiopian eunuch apply to you. What can stand in the way of you being baptized? Absolutely nothing!

Join God’s family today!

The Open Table

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Gospel of Luke, Scripture, Worship

The presence of Jesus is amplified and recognized when we most fully live like him in the world.

As Luke draws volume 1 of his Gospel to a close (Acts being volume 2), his focus shifts slightly from what Jesus does in the world (vol. 1) to what his disciples do in the world as his representatives (vol. 2). There are, however, a few stories between that overlap. Jesus has risen from the dead and appears to the disciples intermittently while his disciples learn to continue ministering without the constant physical presence of their Messiah. My favorite of these stories is the road to Emmaus.

As I work through this text in preparation for preaching it this Sunday, I’m struck by two major points. The first being that the disciples have lost all hope because of the crucifixion. They watched as their friend and Messiah was arrested, beaten, and executed, and now they are at a loss for what to do. The story is clear that these two disciples were leaving the rest of the group in Jerusalem, presumably to return to their pre-discipleship life. Listen to their words of despair and confusion. After asking this stranger (Jesus) about his knowledge of the previous week’s events, Jesus responds:

“What things?” he asked. “About Jesus of Nazareth,” they replied. “He was a prophet, powerful in word and deed before God and all the people. The chief priests and our rulers handed him over to be sentenced to death, and they crucified him; but we had hoped that he was the one who was going to redeem Israel. And what is more, it is the third day since all this took place. In addition, some of our women amazed us. They went to the tomb early this morning but didn’t find his body. They came and told us that they had seen a vision of angels, who said he was alive. Then some of our companions went to the tomb and found it just as the women had said, but they did not see Jesus.”

Luke 24:19-24 NIV (emphasis added)

Their confusion and hopelessness is clear. “We had hoped…” indicates that to them this is no longer a reality, and “…they did not see Jesus” leads us to the confusion and disbelief. Yes, the women saw it and told about it, yes, the men went there, but there was no Jesus.

The grief and dismay that surrounded this event is effecting these disciples deeply. They had been told repeatedly that Jesus would be crucified, but would rise again (Luke 9:21-27, 9:43-45, 18:31-34). This news, however, was so shocking and contrary to their own notions about Jesus’ ministry that they simply didn’t make sense. And now, at this moment on the road to Emmaus, the teaching they had received was absent from their minds and hearts.

The solution? Jesus points them back to Scripture!

“Did not the Messiah have to suffer these things and then enter his glory?” And beginning with Moses and all the Prophets, he explained to them what was said in all the Scriptures concerning himself.

Luke 24:26-27 NIV

In the midst of grief, dismay, and hopelessness, Jesus points the disciples back to Scripture (read the Old Testament). This is of enormous significance. He could have simply revealed who he was to them and restored their faith through the physical sight of himself. Yet Jesus doesn’t operate this way. Instead, he points these disciples back to the timeless texts of their Bibles (Old Testament). These texts established their faith as children, and Jesus uses them to clarify what God was doing in the world through Jesus.

The second thing that stands out to me is how they recognize Jesus. Now that their hope and faith is restored through a message from Scripture, Jesus is going to continue down the road and leave the disciples. Instead, the disciples invite this man (who is still a stranger to them at this point) to stay and eat with them.

Table fellowship is a huge theme in Luke’s Gospel! Over and over again we read of Jesus eating with those marginalized by society. Most of his criticism from the religious establishment came as a direct result of who Jesus ate with. What we often miss is that eating with someone was a sign of acceptance of that person. When you eat with someone you now share a bond, a commitment to one another. This is why it’s all the more shocking that Judas betrayed Jesus on the same night that they dined together in the upper room.

On the way to Emmaus, the disciples renewed faith leads them to act like Jesus. Notice that they welcome the stranger and open their table to him. And it is at that moment, when they imitate Jesus through the open table that they recognize their Lord.

When he was at the table with them, he took bread, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them. Then their eyes were opened and they recognized him, and he disappeared from their sight.

Luke 24:30-31 NIV

When the disciples were hopeless and their faith almost gone, Jesus points them back to the Scriptures. And when the disciples act like Jesus in welcoming this stranger to their table, their eyes are opened, and they recognize the presence of their Lord.

Opening the Scriptures and gathering around the table with our Lord was vital to the faith of these disciples. It was in these events that the disciples encountered the risen Jesus. Why would it be any different for you and me?

So…what are you doing this Sunday?

My Father’s House?

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Gospel of Luke, Jesus

Luke is a master when it comes to dropping subtle clues in his writings. From the beginning of his Gospel, Luke wants you to know that Jesus isn’t just an ordinary man. He is human, yes, but he is also God in human form. And Luke shares this with us in many ways throughout the early chapters of his Gospel.

In Chapter 2 we get a story that no other Gospel writer tells. I believe Luke must have gotten this from Mary herself, especially since he relays Mary’s inner thoughts (see 1:3, 2:51). Jesus disappears from the family caravan at Passover. Mary and Joseph cannot find him anywhere, so they return to the city of Jerusalem and find Jesus in the temple courts discussing Scripture with the teachers.

What really stands out to me is the way Jesus responds to the question from his mother.

When his parents saw him, they were overwhelmed. His mother said to him, “Child, why have you treated us like this? Look, your father and I have been looking for you anxiously.” But he replied, “Why were you looking for me? Didn’t you know that I must be in my Father’s house?”

Biblical Studies Press, The NET Bible First Edition; Bible. English. NET Bible.; The NET Bible (Biblical Studies Press, 2005), Lk 2:48–49.

Did you notice Jesus’ words here? Compare the words of Mary to those of Jesus. Who is the “father” of Jesus? According to Jesus, he was exactly where he was supposed to be…in his Father’s house.

The word play here isn’t accidental. This is just one small example of how Luke fills his Gospel with subtle (and some not so subtle) ways of reminding us of the true identity of Jesus. Next time we’ll look at the words of Elizabeth and what they tell us about Jesus.

(I’ll be dropping some of these every week since I will be reading this Gospel a lot between now and the time I start preaching through it in December. If you’re looking for a reading plan that will drill down on Luke’s Gospel before the end of the year, you can join me. Here’s a reading plan for Luke that my Small Group is going through, and here’s what I’m reading in addition to that.)

Prayer: What is it Good For?

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Gospel of Luke, Prayer

Have you ever struggled with how to pray? Have you ever felt like you are supposed to say nice things and be thankful, but you really don’t know how to do that? You’re not alone.

Jesus’ followers asked him to teach them how to pray. It was (and still is) very common in the Jewish world to have memorized prayers for different situations. There was a routine set of prayers that you used every day, and in every situation in which you find yourself. Acts shows us that the early church continued the practice of “the prayers.” (Acts 2:42, 3:1, etc.)

Because of this practice, it’s no wonder that Jesus’ followers wanted their Rabbi to teach them a prayer. Afterall, John had done that for his disciples. (Luke 11:1) And in Luke’s account, due to their request, Jesus gives them a prayer to recite.

 “When you pray, say: 

“ ‘Father, 

hallowed be your name, 

your kingdom come. 

Give us each day our daily bread. 

Forgive us our sins, 

for we also forgive everyone who sins against us. g 

And lead us not into temptation.’ ” 

 Lk 11:2–4 NIV

Notice that it’s Jesus’ expectation that his disciples will pray these exact words. For some reason in my past that rote prayers became akin to vain repetitions, but Jesus doesn’t see it that way at all! He expects his disciples to repeat these words over and over again. “When you pray, say…” The Greek word for “when” is hotan, which means “whenever.” Jesus wanted his disciples to pray this prayer over and over and over again until it became second nature to them.

Why? Because in this prayer we find the heart of Jesus revealed. What he prayed for is of first importance to him and his mission, as it should be for us today when we recite this prayer. In his book You Are What You Love: The Spiritual Power of Habit, James K. A. Smith talks about the habitual practices we all encounter every day. Even your morning routine, or work routine, or shopping routine, or school routine program and shape you into a product of the world, not a product of the Kingdom. We need reprogramming, and Spiritual habits like prayer do just that!

“If our loves can be disordered by secular [routines], it’s also true that our loves need to be reordered (recalibrated) by [counterroutines]–embodied, communal practices that are ‘loaded’ with the gospel and indexed to God and his kingdom.”

You Are What You Love: The Spiritual Power of Habit by James K. A. Smith, pgs. 57-58

This is exactly what prayer, and specifically the Lord’s Prayer, is designed to do in our life. Prayer isn’t so much moving God into our will, but being shaped into the mission and will of the Father.

I hope you’ll join us Sunday morning at 9:30 CST as we talk about Prayer: Grasping the Heart of God.

Daily Psalms – Psalm 2

by Matthew Stidham, posted in Psalms

Before you read this psalm in your Bible, first read 2 Samuel 7, and then turn over to Psalm 2.

Psalm 2 has no designation at the beginning of authorship as many of the psalms do, but Acts 4:25 tells us that David is the author.

Psalm 2 is a call for those who do not follow Yahweh to submit to Him, serving Him only. David also speaks of God’s “anointed” (lit. messiah) who is also His “son” who will rule over all the nations and punish those who stand against Him.

By reading this messianic psalm you can easily see why many felt like the Messiah would simply be an earthly ruler. Considering David’s life, there was a very practical earthly application to this psalm. David’s son (Solomon) would be anointed (as would every earthly king descended from David) and would face opposition as he came to the throne. David’s reign as king was full of opposition from earthly kings. Again, a very clear earthly reason for its writing.

But the eternal promise from God to David carries the application of this Psalm forward to future kings.

Your house and your kingdom will endure forever before me; your throne will be established forever.

2 Samuel 7:16 NIV

This psalm is a reflection on the promise of God in 2 Samuel 7 to establish the eternal throne of David, and therefore extends to the kingly descendants of David, including Jesus.

Peter and the early persecuted disciples saw this psalm as applying to Jesus’ suffering at the hands of Pilate and the leaders of Israel (Acts 4:23-31).

Paul saw this psalm as being central to the message of the Gospel.

“We tell you the good news: What God promised our ancestors he has fulfilled for us, their children, by raising up Jesus. As it is written in the second Psalm:

“‘You are my son;
    today I have become your father.’”

Acts 13:32-33 NIV

The writer of Hebrews also uses this psalm to show that Jesus is greater than the angels (1:5) and that it is God who appointed Jesus as our ultimate high priest (5:5).

Our encouragement from Psalm 2 today is that our God is over all the nations, and the entire earth is his. He will rule through his Son, the promised Messiah, to bring about justice on the earth. But we must submit and worship His Son. Refusing to do so leads to our destruction. As David reminds us:

Blessed are all who take refuge in him.

Psalm 2:12b NIV

My encouragement to you is to spend some time in the Psalms. They are the story of God’s relationship with his people, and point forward to the coming of the Messiah. The New Testament writers saw the Psalms as essential to understanding the life, ministry, and reign of Jesus. Shouldn’t we as well?